I have two questions for you:
QUESTION 1: Do you know what’s important to you?
QUESTION 2: If you do know, do you live your life in a way that allows you to honor what’s important?
Earlier this year while on retreat in Montnegre, I sat down and asked myself this question. The answer I uncovered had a powerful impact on me. Perhaps because I was in a place of openness and stillness, I quickly discovered that which is important to me:
my relationship with God
the family I am creating daily with my partner, Carlos
running a business that financially supports me and my family
Arriving at the answer to Question 1 was relatively easy. Being the answer to Question 2 is where the real work began. Once I became clear on what’s important to me, I began identifying areas in my life that were pulling me away from my priorities. There were a lot of them. Some of those areas had quite a hold on me (some of them still do). But at least my goals and purpose are now clear:
In this moment, how can I be in a way that honors what’s important to me?
I’ll admit, sometimes I drift far away from my priorities. If I imagine them in a golden circle, I find that I am very far away from the circle. Even though it’s frustrating, having the golden circle is important. It’s what serves as my compass and guides me back.
I’m experiencing powerful results. I am now dedicated to a practice of connecting with God and with that quiet space inside of myself that holds a special kind of energy. I am also enjoying my relationship with Carlos and all that it entails, including creating a comfortable home for us. Additionally, business has picked up considerably. I am much bolder when it comes to making proposals and asking for fees. I do this to honor the priority of being able to support myself and contribute to my family.
I’ve also experienced some pain. Honoring what’s important to me has required me saying ‘no’ to a lot of people and things. There are so many juicy temptations that require time and energy; valuable resources that I’ve chosen to allocate to my ‘golden circle’. I’ve had to say ‘no’ in situations where I used to say ‘yes’. And in the process, I’ve had to disappoint and hurt quite a few people. This is the painful part of living life in a way that honors what’s important to me. Over time, it is getting a bit easier. When people “negatively” react to me setting limits, I find that I am disidentifying with their reaction more and more.
So why am I sharing all of this? Because I have repeatedly experienced the power of creating space to find clarity, and desire to do the same for others. On January 21st and 22nd, 2017 in Barcelona, Spain, I will be co-hosting a workshop that will aim to provide an experience similar to the one that I created for myself while on retreat in Montnegre. The workshop will involve exercises for individuals to connect with what is important to them, and to make powerful agreements. By the end of the workshop (and if my co-facilitator and I fulfill our roles well), attendees will have a strong foundation off of which to make decisions and take action. It’s my hope that everyone will leave with optimism and enthusiasm about living a fulfilling life. If you yourself are in the Barcelona area and could benefit by connecting with what’s important to you, I would love for you to join us. Click here for more details.